UEFA Cup Final Preview

Fun fact: American international Jim Brown played for both clubs and represented USA at the World Cup. The 1930s were a wild time. Sorry, Cleveland fans, not THE Jim Brown, but a Jim Brown who lived an interesting life that a sports and literature writer may write a future book about (not THE COLORS WE BLEED FOR, but something else in the next few years). But I digress.

Harry Kane left Tottenham Hotspurs for Bayern Munich, and two years later he finally won something other than a participation trophy. Can the other half of the Kane-Spurs divorce do the same? Yeah, probably. Will they? Ehhh… maybe. The only thing standing between them and the European equivalent to winning the NIT is the most wildly inconsistent Manchester United team to take the pitch since like the mid 80s. If ManU shows up, they walk away Champions. If being the main operator.

Neither club has the edge in coaching. Both managers are intriguing, but neither have the pedigree for a Real Madrid to buy out their contract anytime soon. They can both punch above their weight class, but neither is clearly superior. Ange Postecoglou has been on the job longer, so if one of them has to be selected, it would probably be him.

Casual fans might be shocked to learn that Marcus Rashford is on loan at Aston Villa. In his absence, Manchester United’s goal scoring duties have been taken up by… committee. The committee to score goals hasn’t always delivered. Wayne Rooney isn’t coming through that door… Berbatov or Best aren’t either. But don’t discount the committee because they lack star power (or consistent finishing ability). Bruno is their most consistent scoring option, and he isn’t even a striker.

Quick aside, from a pure competitive standpoint, this has been arguably the best Premier League season, ever. The fact that ManU and Spurs may both finish bottom six instead of top six is nothing short of amazing. That said, this is probably also the greatest instance of two fundamentally flawed teams playing for a championship. Both teams are much luckier than good, and one of them is about to see their luck run out.

Could there be an X factor? Yes. Do I have a wild guess as to what it is? Also, yes. There is a statistic that if a team fires a manager, they have a much greater than 50% chance of winning their next game. Rumor is Manchester United could have their fourth coach of the season. As of when I am writing this, Ruben is still the boss. There are reports (of suspect credibility) that he has “all but resigned.” Sir Jim Ratcliffe should not tender his resignation before Friday’s match against Chelsea. If he’s going to resign, be sacked, be hit by a comet, whatever, let it happen after the game against Chelsea. Then whomever becomes the fourth manager of the year can finish the UEFA Cup Final and the Premier League finale against Villa. That’s the X factor. Probably not gonna happen, but it would sure be a wild card.

Suppose there is a new sheriff in town. My heart says Sir Jim needs to bring back Sir Alex. Yes, I know he’s no spring chicken. Yes, I know he hasn’t coached in years. Yes, I know he has a legacy. Yes, I still want the legend to come back for two weeks to win one more trophy. I may have ingested a fatal dose of copium. There are plenty of retired players and club personnel who could step in, too. Kinda looking at you, Phil Neville. Or even Gary Neville, as Phil would likely be busy.

If Ruben is still in charge, Spurs win. If he gets the axe before the Chelsea game, Spurs win. If the stars align and he is given his marching orders after the Chelsea match, Manchester United lift the UEFA Cup, regardless of who’s at the helm.

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